The poor decision I made 20 minutes ago

That awkward moment when you haven't blogged in over a month.

I'm a monster.

In any event, it is currently very late, but it's Friday, so it's irrelevant. That's right, I walk on the wild side.

I was planning on going to bed around 1:30, on the couch while season two of Arrested Development played on a continuous loop. Like I said, wild side.

However, around 1 o'clock Mallory came home and promptly found a youtube video titled "50 Greatest Harry Potter Moments".

If you know me even a little bit, you probably know that there are few things I would rather do than watch a compilation of Harry Potter moments, organized in order of greatness. That's just how I roll. An issue arose, however, when it was revealed that the video was one and a half hours long.

"We're not going to watch all of it." Mallory said, sure that we would fall asleep in no time. I agreed. Oh, how misguided we were.

Just as the video began to play, Mallory paused it, turned to me and said "Ok, what are the top five moments?"

Apart from being slightly ironic (being in blatant contradiction to our previous claim that we would not make it to the end.We're just winners at everything), it was also a weighty question. Despite what you would assume if you saw my apartment, my mind can be bizarrely organized when it involves things that hold no relevancy to being a functioning member of society. I'm like a child who ranks their favorite sandwiches in order of yummyness and blurts it out an inappropriate times, only with Disney Princesses and Community quotes.

I had, unfortunately, not figured out my top five Harry Potter moments. I have favorites to be sure, but to narrow it down to a definitive top five was stress inducing.

I eventually concluded that I did not have a set top, however moments I knew would be in my highest rankings would be as follows.

In no particular order:
The kiss between Ron and Hermione: I was more emotionally invested in their relationship than 50% of my own.

The Prince's Tale: All the feelings. All the tears. All the awards to Alan Rickman.

"Yer a Wizard, Harry": Just duh.

The Resurrection Stone: The reunion of the Marauders and Harry makes me cry in all it's mediums.

So we watched it. And it was fantastic. It was basically like an adrenaline shot of nostalgia and emotion and lists, it was unhealthy. We laughed, we almost cried, we fangirl-ed over Rupert Grint. It was an all around good time.

Until it reached the top ten.

"Yer a Wizard, Harry" was number 10, which was fine. It still counts as an acknowledged top ranking moment. I still win.

After that point, I became so stressed, I cannot even begin to understand it. Each moment before the presentation of the next rank was anxiety producing and nerve wracking. Like I said, unhealthy.

The closer they got to #1 the clearer it became that my top three moments were not going to be represented. I became irate.

How dare that kiss not be in the top ten!? Are you a soulless monster, or is there another reason the Resurrection stone scene doesn't move you to your core? Are you Helen Keller and could neither see nor hear the scene where Snape's whole life story is revealed?

The number one moment ended up being some throw back nostalgia shot of the kids all seeing Hogwarts for the first time, which is great, I'm not a monster, but I was not pleased.

We complained, loudly, to ourselves, no doubt disturbing out normal-sleeping-hours neighbors. It wasn't until the final seconds when Robbie Coltrane (did I mention that Robbie Coltrane narrated this? Yeah, he totally did. It was mega awesome) said something along the lines of "We can't wait to see the final installment in 2011" that we realized that not a single one of the moments was from the second part of Deathly Hallows and that the date on the bottom of the video read "2010" and also that we'd made a huge mistake.

So needless to say, I will be making my own list of top 50 Harry Potter moments in the near future.

Unity Sand

Recently, a lot of people I know have been getting married. Not really super close friends, but about 10% of the people that I casually sort of kind of know have entered or are about to enter into the bonds of matrimony.

I've crept through wedding photos, and it didn't take a great deal of deduction to see that there's a growing trend in weddings.

Unity sand.

Back in the day, the thing was unity candles. Two flames were brought together to form one. The symbolism is pretty clear. Two people joining their lives together, to create one burning flame of passion and eternal love. There is a 94% chance that your parents had one of these.

I mean, there hasn't been a huge eradication of the unity candles, but at some point in the mid 2000's some unanimous decision was reached, by the trendy wedding council that candles were out, and sand was in.

The idea is cool. Two jars of sand are poured into a larger jar. I dare you to try and separate that sand back into its original jar.

Then I guess you keep the sand in your house on a pedestal or something. I'm not really sure.

As popular as this sand thing is, I'm getting the impression that it's time will soon be up. It had a good run, but most people seem to think that it's over used. So I'm predicting that in ten years people will look back and be like "Yeah, sand. That's so 2000 and late." I'm cool with this. It's not like I grew up picturing a perfect white dress and a jar from Hobby Lobby filled with colored sand. There's just going to be a void. And I have taken it upon myself to trail blaze new tangible representations of eternal love a unity.

Cement Hand Prints of Unity: This is good on a couple levels. One, you can't make hard concrete soft again, therefore symbolizing your eternal commitment. And two, you can keep the hand prints in your house as a modern art piece. That's how you start a marriage right.

The Burnt CD of Unity: I'm not really an expert on how CDs work, but I'm pretty sure that if you burn a CD, it cannot be made blank again. So during the ceremony, the Bride and Groom can put their favorite play list of songs that "just feel like they were written about us" into disk form. Additional bonus: That CD can then be used on the honeymoon for setting the mood if they so choose.

Permanent Black Hair Dye of Unity: That stuff does not ever come out.

Jello Jigglers of Unity: Jello is one of the most peculiar substances on earth. You can literally not make it a liquid again. So during the wedding, while your sister is singing a song and your cousin reads 1Corinthians 13:4-7, you and your spouse can walk to the alter, and start making jello. He pours the boiling water, she adds powder, they both stir and add the cold water. Then they walk, hand in hand, to the kitchen in the church, put the jello in the refrigerator, and wait till after the reception. Then they can eat it on their honeymoon to solidify they're eternal love.

I look forward to all of these ideas being featured in wedding blogs within the next ten years.

This is a love story.

It all began sophomore year. Just a wide eyed girl, going through life, not a care in the world, stumbled upon a black cardigan.

Spoiler alert: That girl is me.

To anyone else, it was just a normal sweater. But not to her. The big black buttons and the perfect arm length were unlike any other cardigan she had ever known. It tied every outfit together, it could dress up any outfit as well as dress one down. One rarely saw this girl without her favorite cardigan. They were inseparable. And like with any other true love, the girl couldn't quite explain what she loved most about the sweater, but she knew that she couldn't imagine her life without it.

That is until I lost it (Yes I'm switching to first person, deal with it).

I don't really remember when exactly it was lost lost. Like, forever lost. It was sort of gradual thing. It would get lost for a while then I'd find it. Oh what a joyous reunion we would have. However, these reunions were always short lived, for sooner rather than later it would be thrust into the cavernous abyss that was my closet growing up.

Also, Emily distinctly lied to me for an entire quarter last year while it was in her closet/on her body. I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust again.

But in all honesty, my relationship with this cardigan is the kind that's portrayed in almost every romantic comedy. We met. There was an instant connection. We were soon inseparable. There would be little times of separation and angst but eventually we would find each other again. I thought it would always be that way.

But life is not a romantic comedy. And sometimes the truest love is the one that's lost.

It seriously is no where to be found. It's not in my apartment, it's not in any closet at home, I've searched Emily's house so I know she's not lying to me this time. I honestly have no idea where it could possibly be. I've resigned myself to the fact that it has probably been thrown away. There are two options. 1) malicious intent 2)accident. (The malicious intent theory is more hard core, but my cardigan never had any enemies that I was aware of.)

I'm going to have to get over it, I know, but it's hard: Knowing that I'll never again feel those same soft fibers against my skin. Never again thread those almost comically large buttons through their corresponding holes. Never again be able to wear a t-shirt in January, or buy a shirt without trying it on, because I know that my cardigan makes everything look awesome. But I'm strong.

I have faith that there is another cardigan out there for me. Maybe not the same as my first, but maybe better for me. Maybe I should stop comparing every cardigan I see to that one, just to see if that would make it any easier to find one. Maybe I should just settle for a nice cardigan that doesn't fit me as well, but maybe has some nice pockets. I could be happy with that, right?

Or maybe I should always remember that cardigan, and even if it never comes back to me, I'll know what its like to have an all purpose, goes with everything, amazing cardigan that makes me feel fantastic. Because that's what every girl deserves.

P.S. I'm 87% sure that the songs "Someone Like You" and "The One That Got Away" were written about my cardigan.